Hello ,

Today, I really want to share something about our mindset and how it affects us.

There is a verse in the Bible that says" I wish above all things that you prosper even as your soul prospers".

Our mindset and our success are interwoven.

When we are going through sad or trying moments, we are often angry that others haven't reached out to us as we thought they should.  

Often times we create an expectation in our minds of how we expect them to reach out because we believe they should know we are hurting and be mindful of our needs. I had this mindset in the past and gradually learning to make peace of the truth.

A few years ago when I lost my mum; I thought I had people who would go the length and breadth of the earth for me but that was my expectation because I would gladly do same for them.

That singular event changed my perception of a lot of people and even the church(a story for another day).

I cut off and wanted to only be there for those who were there for me.

Few weeks after the burial, a friend who assumed I shut her out just because I wasn't sharing my pain as she expected, also chose to shut me out that period but I never noticed because I was grieving.

I got a disturbing text from her one evening about her miscarriage( I wasn't even aware she was pregnant though she said she sent a text plus my head was a mess prior to that time) and asking me if I was happy now that she lost the baby in the text. 

My head did 20 somersaults in a few seconds because I knew how much we wanted her pregnant but that text...I can't even describe my feelings.

Losing a pregnancy is nothing I pray my enemies to even experience because I have experienced it and it took God for me not to fall into depression.

Despite that, I rushed out the next day to see her but she shut me out physically and emotionally, and with me still mourning I wished her well, cut off, and allowed myself grieve the death of my mum and the friendship.

Recently, I got the news of her being delivered of a baby girl( I was so happy because the wait was almost 8 years and God showed up strong).

Though we are no longer friends I still wish her well and did a shoki dance.

Be mindful of the kind of expectations you place on humans going through the same human experience as you. 

Learn to accept how and when they show up and in whatever capacity even if you expect more.

, having less expectations will help you understand that your life and business is your sole responsibility, should anyone offer to be there to help you, appreciate them because not everyone would want to truly share in your pain.

Wishing you an amazing weekend

Xoxo

Olufunke