Hi ~

There is much to be said about forgiveness, and this email will only touch on it.

I’ve addressed forgiveness in several blog posts. Here are some of them:

·      The “Root of Bitterness” in Hebrews–It Isn’t Unforgiveness (This one later went into my first Untwisting Scriptures book.)

·      How to Handle Those “Forgive and Forget” Scriptures

·      That Forgiveness Talk at Harvest Bible Chapel

·      How Pedophiles Are Forgiven, From the Teachings of Jay Adams

·      Encouraging Thoughts on Forgiveness and Grief

This email you’re reading now gives a slightly different (though complementary) perspective, one that I hadn’t considered but I believe has validity.

In an earlier email to you, when I asked something about resources, I received a reply from Jane Bartelmes, which she has given me permission to pass along to you.

This is from Jane’s book, My Path from Doormat to Dignity: A Personal Story, which you can see here. 

Let it go, or send it forth?

When it comes to offenses, we’ve all been told by well-meaning advisors to just “let it go.” This works well for minor offenses and even for significant ones, but not so much for those that cut to the quick. To advise the victim of a serious wrong to just “let it go” is an affront—as if to say, “What happened to you may have shredded your heart and ravaged your soul, but it’s really not that big of a deal.”

According to [Beth] Moore, forgiveness does not mean to “let it go,” it means to “send it forth.” Where do things go that I didn’t deserve and that pierced my soul? I want to know because they were costly to me! In all honesty, there are some things we can’t just let go, but we can “send” them to God. He is the only one who knows all that has transpired. He is the only one who can fully enter our pain, and only he knows the price we paid. And importantly, we can trust him to ultimately balance any scales that need balancing. God knows far better than you or me how to rightly assess a situation. We don’t fully know the intent of the one who wounded us—but he does. And unlike anything we could come up with, the consequences God metes out are always a perfect balance of truth and grace. Moore asserts that instead of letting serious offenses go, she “FedExes” them to her God. He alone has the knowledge, the right, the power, and the wisdom to handle them appropriately.

I appreciate this way of looking at the concept of forgiveness, since “why can’t you just let it go,” as well-meaning as the person might be, communicates a message of minimizing the trauma.

Our Lord doesn’t minimize the trauma. He grieves with us in it, and He is glad to heal us, bit by bit or all at once.

One of our goals as the people of our great God, is to be with others in their grief.

With you in longing to communicate the compassionate heart of God,

Rebecca

Untwisting Scriptures at heresthejoy.com

See my Untwisting Scriptures series

P.S. Jane has graciously told me that if you’d like to receive her book for free, she’ll be glad to send you a PDF. Just reply to this email, and I’ll forward your request to her.

Note: If you purchase from links in my emails, I may receive a commission, but it is at no additional cost to you.