A few years ago, I felt helpless.

It was the darkest time of my life.

My days and nights were spent in complete solitude.

My mind was constantly filled with anxiety and feelings of dread.

And despite suffering for what felt like an eternity, no one came to save me.

I was alone.

It wasn’t until a number of years later that I realised something crucial.

The truth is, I didn’t need anyone to save me.

I wasn’t a damsel in distress.

I was a man, behaving like a boy.

I didn’t need Superman to come and save me from my sorrow.

Instead, I had to save myself.

And although it took me a very long time to learn this lesson, I’m glad I did.

Uncovering this insight was worth the years of torment I was subjecting myself

to.

Because ever since making this realisation, nothing in my life has ever been the same.

It’s weird.

You don’t realise how influential your beliefs are until they get shattered and

replaced with new ones.

Before realising I was the hero in my own story, I believed I was a victim.

Everyone in the world was to blame except me.

It was my school’s fault for encouraging me to go to university.

It was the university’s fault for not making me feel welcome.

It was the people around me’s fault for being too stupid.

It was my parent’s fault for not loving me enough.

Blah, blah, blah.

All nonsense.

At least, that’s how I feel now.

At the time, all of these things were true.

Why?

Because I believed them to be.

Never underestimate the placebo effect.

It can make you feel things which aren’t real.

Because I believed all of those negative things to be true, it affected the way I

lived my life.

Because I didn’t like the city I was in, every rotten aspect of it was emphasised in my mind.

Because I was socially anxious, I didn’t trust any of the people around me.

Sure, the copious amounts of cannabis in my system didn’t help matters.

But make no mistake, it was my own beliefs which clouded the way I viewed other people.

However, once my beliefs changed, the world around me changed with it.

Obviously it didn’t happen overnight.

But it felt instant.

As soon as people online started telling me my life was my fault, I was suddenly receptive to the message.

I was ready to be told the truth.

A few years before, I would have completely dismissed their claims.

But after living in a state of perpetual victimhood for long enough, I realised

nothing was going to change.

Tangible change does take time.

But once it happens, nothing remains the same.

Ever since taking full responsibility for my life, I’ve never once blamed someone

else for something in my life.

Prior to this revelation, I was never the reason for my problems.

It was always someone else’s fault.

Now I know it was me all along.

I was the reason my life was so awful.

I was the one filling my lungs with smoke.

I was the one giving myself anxious thoughts.

No one else.

This realisation freed me.

Back when I was blaming everything except myself, I felt powerless.

I was just a feather being blown around by nature, completely incapable of dictating my own direction.

But once I realised I wasn’t a feather, but a bird — I started to fly.

And although it took some time to build up the muscles in my wings, it wasn’t long until I began to soar.

This is what taking control of your life can do.

You no longer allow anything external to control you.

You’re the one in charge.

You’re the one who makes the decisions.

And you’re the only one who will ever save yourself.

I hope you found this useful.

Thanks for reading,

Godfrey