There I was.

Minding my own business.

Eating a bowl of rice and chicken.

The food was divine and my mood was sensational.

Why?

Because while enjoying my meal, I was simultaneously flirting my face off.

Sitting across from me were 3 women.

GORGEOUS women.

A Turk, A Brit and an Iranian Russian hybrid.

My two eyes were fixated on all 3 of them.

How’s this possible?

I have no idea.

I must have been both horny and hungry.

The chat started off pleasant enough.

I asked them what their favourite vegetables were, and then proceeded to slam

dunk on every single one of their answers.

One of them even said “tomatoes”.

Girl, tomato is a fruit.

And besides, they’re absolutely disgusting.

I’d rather be smacked in the face by a prime Scarlett Johanson than be forced

to eat a single tomato.

After absolutely destroying their taste in fruit and vegetables, the subject somehow turned to phones.

I looked around the table and saw everyone had the same one.

An iPhone Pro Max 15.

Whatever the hell that is.

I looked up how much they cost and had to pinch myself.

This is how much phones cost nowadays?

Anyway, I pointed this observation out and got a bunch of funny looks.

Almost as if to say, “of course we have the latest iPhone. What the hell do you take us for?”

I pretended to admire their taste and then jokingly told them that I owned a

Samsung Galaxy S6.

As soon as I said this, the hot hybrid looked at me with a face of pure shock and said “You own an Android??”.

I looked at her in bewilderment.

Yes I own an Android.

Her face turned into an expression of thunder.

How dare I own such a pathetic excuse for a mobile phone.

Didn’t I get the memo?

It’s iPhone or no phone.

This was when I realised I was dealing with an iPhone supremacist.

Nothing I could do could salvage the situation.

Nothing except a piece of genius humour.

I decided read her mind out loud and called myself a peasant.

This was hilarious.

The entire table broke into a giggling fit.

I had them all in the palm of my hand.

The puppet master in the full flow of a performance.

Once the laughter died down, I reassured them I wasn’t a complete peasant.

Back in the day, I used to have an iPhone 4s.

Although this was in 2018.

About 7 years after it’s original release!

I don’t know what it is with me and phones.

Would I like a new one?

Sure.

I honestly have nothing against them.

I’ve just always been a bit odd when it comes to buying phones.

My first ever phone was a Samsung slide thingy.

That little bugger was indestructible.

I used to smash it all over the place and nothing would happen to it.

A true marvel.

My next phone was utter trash.

It was so bad, I honestly forgot the brand that created it (I just checked Google

and it was HTC).

This was my first smartphone and sucked big time.

Thankfully, my friend accidentally kicked the living daylights out of it in the gym

while he was doing some pull ups and completely destroyed the phone.

He was super apologetic.

But I was relieved.

Thank God I’d been freed from that awful phone.

It was at this point that I got my hands on another friend’s iPhone 4s.

Honestly, this was probably the best phone I’ve had.

I used it for a number of years before it just started to crash on me all the time.

When the writing was on the wall, for some reason I went back to my roots and copped a Samsung.

But instead of being high IQ and sensible, I turned to Ebay to try and make the most of a bargain.

The result was a Samsung Galaxy S6 for around £70.

The phone came and since day 1, the middle button has never worked.

I’m laughing just writing this, haha.

Nevertheless, I’ve had it since around 2020 and it’s been a decent servant.

At least it works.

But with that said, my next phone will probably be an iPhone.

I don’t want to be a peasant anymore.

Plus, that Russian Persian hybrid might fall madly in love with me as soon as she sees me with an Apple product.

Kidding.

She already is…

In all seriousness, I find it interesting how people wed themselves to certain brands.

People who buy Apple products would never in a million years

even consider buying an Android.

Whereas people who think that Android is superior in some way, wouldn’t be caught dead with an Apple product.

These brands tailor to specific people and it’s clear why they’ve managed to

become so successful.

Obviously, Apple is absolutely dominating the phone market.

It’s not even close.

Yet, my contrarian nature makes me not want to buy any of their stuff.

If everyone wants an iPhone and everyone around me has an iPhone, why the

hell should I have one?

There’s something about me that wants to be different.

When in reality, these are just products.

They don’t mean anything.

If you buy an iPhone, you’re not cool.

We’re not in school anymore.

You’re not cool for owning a Blackberry (these were massive when I was at school).

You’re just a customer.

This fun encounter I had is a reminder of how powerful the art of persuasion is.

These brands have an insane amount of knowledge when it comes to

psychology.

Luckily for you, I wrote a book on this topic.

You can get it for free here.

Anyway, that’s all I’ve got for now.

Thanks for reading and I’ll see you later,

Godfrey

PS. Do you think I'm a peasant for owning an Android?

Let me know by replying to this email.