So yesterday, I sent you an email .
If di mo nabasa, the subject was: Toxic
And yeah...
Ganon na halos ang mababasa mo online nowadays.
Pero alam mo bang you still have the full control?
Kasi it's all about how you manage people, thoughts or anything around you.
And speaking of management, I guess the email response I got yesterday is the best example of this.
This was her response to me:
I'm sharing this to you while hiding her identity to teach you a lesson behind her story.
And I guess she'll read this too.
(Wag kang mahihiya, di ka nag iisa sis)
LESSON #1:
You're not alone
Sabi pa nya, feeling nya nag iisa sya.
Yung tipong walang nakakaintindi sa kanya.
Pero alam mo bang that's a lie?
Back then, I totally felt the same.
Except lang sa we weren't married and...
Namatay na ang Mama ko when betrayal happened plus...
Fortunately, my siblings cared so much about my sanity.
Which means we almost had the same feelings back then.
Pero alam mo why I had 180 degrees mindset shift?
It's because I learned na di ako nag iisa.
I na lahat pala ng naka experience ng betrayal sa peak
moments...
...feeling din pala nila sila lang ang minalas sa buhay, sa relationship, etc.
Again, di ka nag iisa.
Yan ang #1 na need mong e inject sa isip mo.
And you'll only feel this when you also find people who won't let you
succumb to this feeling.
Yung mga taong di huhusga sayo even if di ka rin naging perfect.
LESSON #2:
How people treats you doesn't matter.
How you TREAT YOURSELF matters.
If your very own family or your husband or kahit anak mo can't understand you now...
...it doesn't matter.
Instead, think about how you can see yourself better.
Kasi alam mo yung hard truth?
You're the first and last cheerleader of yourself.
So how you think about yourself backfires to how people treat you.
If you think of yourself as garbage or walang saysay ang buhay...
...you'll also attract the same treatment.
But when you finally see your worth and act on your self-development,
...people will begin feel the aura you carry.
In short, it all starts and ends with you.
So make sure you think good, feel good and act good about yourself.
LESSON #3:
You can only BEGIN to take care of your kid/s well
when you finally begin to take care of yourself well
This might be hard to digest.
But believe me, as I look back to my healing journey,
I can say I hadn't been my best in taking care of my son
even if I thought at that time I was doing my best.
And I understand if gusto mo maalagaan at makasama ang anak mo.
If working mom ka or LDR with your kid/s, take action to have time
with your kids.
Pero I tell you the truth...
You'll maximize your time, attention and love sa anak mo once ikaw mismo
nagawa mo na yun sa sarili mo.
It's never easy to be a Mom while healing.
I'm speaking from experience.
And it's always challenging to raise your future generation
while still healing from your triggers, trauma or overthinking.
That's why you're called for a bigger mission.
Para pagdating ng panahon when it's their time to build their home,
they'll no longer experience the same trauma and low self-esteem
that you're experiencing.
Oh sya...
Ang haba na ng email na to.
Just really thought of sending you my thoughts for today.
And remember, as a woman, especially a Mom...
...you're called to be the Light and The Godly Builder of your HOME.
To your peace and joy,
FJ Lapera
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