He feels so secured, feels at peace at feeling like he has no problem at all.
And I feel the same way.
Payapa ang puso while nakangiti na natatawa how I treated him in the past.
Ang baby boy ko na ngayon sinasabihan ko ng "Big Boy" na at binago ko na rin ang kantang lagi kong kinakanta sa kanya at request nya rin ngayon each time pinapatulog ko sya.
Yes, I composed my own song for him, .
That's just me even if di naman talaga ako singer.
I want to give him the best of me and the memory he would remember about us.
I remember back then sa peak moments ng pain ko, kahit alam kong mahal na mahal ko sya, I also remember napapabayaan ko na sya.
Pero back then, I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Until one day, ang mahal kong to rin ang nagpa realize sa akin na need kong magising.
Kasi sa araw na yun, I felt the exact hatred he had for me even if he can't speak it well due to his age.
And dahil mahal na mahal ko sya at ayaw kong puro hate ang maalala nya about us, I picked up my broken self.
Sa una, talagang mahirap.
Yung mga araw na nilalabanan mo ang fears mo.
Takot na harapin ang mga feeling mong problema na di mo kakayaning mag isa.
But I did it.
At mas fulfilling pala kung nakakaya mong mag isa.
Talagang pa plus points na ni Lord yun kung after mo nakayang mag isa ay natauhan ang isa pang minahal mo ng sobra.
Kaya my single biggest advice for you?
Kayanin mo muna mag isa.
Kapag nakaya mong mag isa, it only means you're strong enough and you can handle your own self so you can also handle better challenges along the way.
Why?
Kasi relationship most especially marriage is full of problems.
Kahit simpleng toothpaste nga lang need mong mag compromise if di kayo similar ng brand na gusto.
Or... yung baka ikaw mas gusto mong e squeeze sa gitna at toothpaste mo at sya naman dapat laging hanggang sa pinaka dulo naka squeeze.
I've heard this one problem from someone na malapit sa puso ko.
And I know na mas marami pang deeper problem lalo na if galing pa sa betrayal stage ang isang relationship trying to fight the battle of insecurities, pain, fears and shame.
Kaya again, do your best to win your own battle alone.
Kasi after you conquer your own, masasabi mong all problems will just come to pass.
And you'll feel like wala kang problemang di mo makakaya.
When that happens, you'll surely feel the paradise you long here on earth.
Thinking about you,
FJ Lapera
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