When we newly got married all I wanted to do was to help my wife to become a better person. I sincerely thought that maybe if she became better, then our marriage would be better.

This is exactly how many couples start. The man is trying to change his wife, while the wife believes it is the husband who needs to change.

If this is not checked, it grows to become more personal where the man is saying, "If you don't change, then you don't respect me". The woman on the other hand thinks that if he loves her, then he will change.

As we saw in the first session of The Marriage Course, it is far easier to change ourselves than it is to change our partner. Especially in the early years of marriage and indeed all through, we would have to keep adjusting if we want to enjoy a fulfilled married life.

The sweetest marriages are the ones where each partner is asking how they can adjust to accommodate their partner rather than insisting their partner must adjust.

Questions For Today

1. How have you adjusted to fit better into your marriage?
2. In which areas do you think a little adjusting may help you enjoy your marriage better
3. How do you feel when you know it is not convenient for your partner but they are intentionally adjusting?
4. How can you encourage and make the adjusting phase easier for your partner

You don't need to answer. Just think about these and if you like, share them with your partner.

Love

Ndu David