Hi Friends,

At the end of the book Dare to Lead by Brené Brown, she discusses the space between what she enjoys in life/work/family versus how she defines success. It was an amazing final checkpoint but almost requires its own book, thought catalogue, set of articles, and video series (please, Brené, thanks in advance!). Here is my experience running through this comparison.

Things That Bring Me Joy

For me, I started to define with what I enjoy - things that bring joy. Here are a few from my list:

• Enjoying slow mornings
• Spending time learning/thinking/growing
• Slow time with family and friends
• Coming up with solutions/systems/processes
• Open space
• Feeling clear on direction
• Warm drinks
• Travel to new cities

A few simple discoveries - most of what I enjoy isn't expensive. Even with something like travel, I enjoy beautiful locations, the price matters very little. I also realized that what gives me energy is not difficult for me to make happen. What about you? What do you enjoy? What brings you joy?

The Way I Define Success

There are many standards of success in our world right now - many revolve around simliar topics. This is how I define success:

• Making more money (lots more)
• A bigger status (much bigger)
• More brag points I can use in conversation (I accomplish this... I did this... I'm known for this...)
• Having the latest of a gadget

And none of these are inheritly bad - we all know this. But what I've learned is that success is a very critical point to define for yourself. So after doing this excercise, I began to push my definition of success even further. More on this in a future newsletter. Now, for you: How do you define success?

Let's Compare: Joy & Success

“There was no time for joy and meaning because we were too busy achieving and we were achieving so we could buy more joy and meaning, but those require time and time is the most precious & undeniable resource isn’t for sale.” Brené Brown

Now, as I run what I enjoy versus what I define as success, a few clear differences present themselves. Here is a list of the top three disconnects for me between both.

1. Believe: I'm living by what I believe: The simple truth is that whatever I do - intentional or unintentional - is a reflection of what I beleive. And if I'm living toward what I define as success, it's because it's what I believe is priority.
2. Courage: It takes courage to go toward what brings us joy. It begins with commitment, which leads to courage, then to confidence, then to capacity. To not get sucked into the seductive force of 'success' requires an intentionality. It requres courage. Very few, few things actually matter, everything else is a distraction.
3. High hope: I heard a quote this week, "Low hope people go back to waht they use to do because it's within their former identity and comfort zone." I need high hope to follow through with what matters most to me and have 'selective ignorance' about everything else.

Belief, courage, and hope are the three things I give up when I chase success. They are the things that I overlook when I set my focus on what I define as successful while overlooking what brings me joy.

Defining Your Own Joy

What about you? What do you enjoy? How do you define success? Do they align?

“The greatest challenge is developing brave leaders is helping them acknowledge and answer their personal call to courage. Courage can be learned if we are willing to put down the armor and pick up shared language, tools, and skills that we need for rumbling with vulnerability, living into our values, braving trust, and learning to rise.” “We fail the minute we let someone else define success for us.” - Brené Brown

My favorite finds this week

• Quote: "The important trick, he said [Seth Godin], is staying attuned to whether switching is simply a failure of perseverance, or astute recognition that better matches are available." - David Epstien in Range
• Video (1hr): Notion Freelancer Template Pack with Ben Issenmann - This interview was about a specific way to monitze Notion but it taught me new ways to think about creating products of the knowledge I have.
• Quote: "Experts don't make courses. Courses make experts." - This quote was said in the interview above.
• Quote: “The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.” - Brené Brown

All in,

David

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By David Iskander

I'm David, a search specialist, and beginner YouTuber from Orange County, CA. My motto is: Whatever you do, do it beautifully. I enjoy making YouTube videos about website design, tech, productivity, and faith.