"I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.” (Romans 17:15)
Depending on how much you’ve read your Bible or if you grew up in church, you’ve probably heard the story of Samson. We know him as the strong man, or maybe the original author of Hey There Delilah, maybe something about a haircut, but for most of us, that’s about the extent of our knowledge. But the thing is, there are some things about Samson that are really important for us to know; there are some things about Samson that I often have to remind myself. Because for most of us, Samson’s story is our story. His pain is our pain, and his journey is our journey. When Samson was born, God made a promise to use him to begin to rescue Israel from the Philistine people. A part of that promise was that Samson was to be a Nazarite, which meant three things: Samson could not drink wine, Samson could not touch dead things, and Samson could not cut his hair. Guess what Samson did? He threw a huge wedding party with wine for everyone, ate honey from the carcass of a dead lion, and got an admittedly pretty traumatic haircut. (And you thought Supercuts was bad, yikes.)
That's right. Samson had ONE job, okay, he had three, but he somehow failed at all three of them. Here’s the thing, though, guess what God still did? He still used Samson to begin to rescue Israel from the Philistine people, just like God said he would. At the end of his story, hair having only barely begun to grow back on his head, Samson accomplished more against the Philistines at the end of his story than he had previously in his entire life. He got almost everything wrong, and God still didn’t let him miss the purpose that He had for him. Am I the only one who deals with uncertainty and failure enough to find some relief in that concept? I think we can often be afraid that, like Samson, we will stray from the plan, or, put honestly, with how we often speak to ourselves, I think we are afraid that we are screwups. Because hey, sometimes we kind of ARE. Well, maybe you aren't, but I definitely am. I probably get more wrong than I get right, I fail more than I succeed, I hurt people I love, I second guess and question every move I make, and like the Biblical author Paul, I find myself saying “I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.” (Romans 17:15) And that can be really hard to live with, sometimes the weight is more than I can take. But that’s where Samson comes in. Because even though he was imperfect and strayed, God didn’t let him miss the things He had for him.
Did Samson make things more difficult for himself than they had to be? Maybe, probably. But God protected him, and even when we fail, God’s love is unconditional. Hebrews 6:18 puts it this way: “So God has given both his promise and his oath. These two things are unchangeable because it is impossible for God to lie. Therefore, we who have fled to him for refuge can have great confidence as we hold to the hope that lies before us.” My friend, we will get it right sometimes, and we will get it wrong, and further, sometimes we won’t even be sure which is which. But God, in his infinite kindness, doesn’t let us miss what He has planned. He has a way of making sure we end up where we need to be. There are no ashes from which He can’t pull beauty, and there is no lemon so sour that God can’t make something resembling lemonade. Whether we are right or wrong, whether on the right path or have strayed off, in His kindness, if we seek Him, He will not let us long miss the path that He has prepared for us. “No one’s ever seen or heard anything like this, never so much as imagined anything quite like it. What God has arranged for those who love him.” - 1 Corinthians 2:9
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