Cancun and Navel Gazing

Feb 12, 2023 6:01 pm

Trust me, it makes sense.

While I rarely stare at my actual navel, I did lots of metaphorical navel gazing while in Mexico. The main questions were: How do I define success? Who am I? What do I want? Why do I want to rescue people?

These are big questions and I don't get away with easy answers like "enough money" or "Me" or "a nice house". I had to pare down and figure this stuff out, as well as define how I want my life to be. I swear the number of times I found anything else to do besides think was depressing. It's rather hard to peer into yourself with a bright light and not let yourself sink into the shadows.

What did I decide you might ask? Well lots of things. I realized I need to quit punishing myself by not being what other people are or liking what they like. I need to lean into being me. Accepting that I write stories that probably aren't mainstream. Leaning into the fact that my style isn't what anyone else's is. But mostly I worked on changing a deep held belief that has caused me a lot of trouble over the years. Am I there yet? Not even. But I see a path to be a me I'm proud of and that is saying a lot.

I'm on the final edits for Puppet Master and it's better than I feared. I think there is a rough part in the middle, but I'll wait for my beta to let me know. It's up for preorder and depending on if people like my characters I may make it into a trilogy.

While you wait for me to publish all the stuff I'm writing, take a look at Children of Alpheios. I love bad government/corporation stories where they try to use people. I love strong women even more. This sounds like a bit of both the question is will anyone be alive at the end?

I've been reviewing Unbalanced Luck and I'm happier with it than I thought. So I'll be back to writing that this week. Don't forget my store is fully updated and I can now ship out signed copies.

Play

There were sounds over the next rise. Sounds like scuffling and shuffling and things that were fun to chase. Keka stuck her head up over the rise, snow coating her. Her belly was full from the rabbit she'd eaten, but chasing things was always fun.

Down in the little hollow were two creatures in bright colors next a the weirdest tree she'd ever seen. Puzzled Keka looked around, it was not spring, so why were there walking flowers? Sharp high sounds made her ears lean back as they tumbled around in the snow. They chased each other and her tail started to twitch. Chase was fun.

With five leaps she was down among the two walking flowers, rolling in the snow with them.

"Kitty!" came out in a sharp squeal from two flowers and she found herself in the snow with the flowers patting her.

Keka blinked and started to struggle to get away, but then it registered the flowers were scritching and petting. It felt so good. Relaxing Keka, purred as the flowers made weird noises but continued to groom her. It wasn't the best grooming, her mother did better, but any grooming felt good.

A sharp high scream broke the air. The two flowers paused in their grooming.

"GET IN HERE NOW!" the scream had panic laced through it. Keka didn't know what the weird sounds meant, but she understood fear. She whirled looking for danger as the flowers scampered to the big tree with shiny bits.

The flowers disappeared into the tree and Keka didn't see anything. There was a sharp clap of sound and then it was quiet. Keka sat there for a minute staring at the shiny tree. Then she sighed and bounded back up the hill. It had been a long day and a nap sounded good.

~*~

"Holy shit. That cougar almost killed you two." Naomi patted down her two girls frantically, her heart trying to race out of her throat.

"No, Momma. She was a nice kitty. She purred."

Naomi just nodded and thought about getting a dog, a very big dog.

~*~

I did manage to catch a bit of a cold (I hope it's only a cold) but I'm still moving forward, though if I don't feel better this evening, I will cancel the yoga. Sigh.

Mel

Schedule 2023: (so far)

NerdiGras: March 10-12 (Atlanta, GA)

JordanCon: April 21-24 (Atlanta, GA)

ConCaolinas: June 2-4 (Charlotte, NC)

LibertyCon: June 22-26 (Chattanooga, TN)

Greece (OMG!): July 17- August 1

Dragoncon: August 30 - Sep 4 (Atlanta, GA)

20BooksVegas: Nov 6-10 (Las Vegas, NV)

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