Today is my birthday and I am still imprisoned to the expectations of others. Although with age I am supposed to gain wisdom, I thought I was also guaranteed to care less. . .but it appears this eludes me still. 

As I strut down the streets of my city, I am still aware of how people view me. I am invested in the keen looks of others and I want to not just ‘fit in’ to the landscape but also stand out with confidence and composure. It’s usually when I am all consumed with this notion that I stumble on an uneven sidewalk, reminded once again to NOT get too full of myself.

So, where does self care fit in? For me, it's a discipline. I have to adopt it as it doesn’t come naturally. 

I’ll give you an example: I bought myself a new pair of shoes this week as an early birthday present and it nearly crippled me. 65 dollars spent to garnish my toes and although I love them, there is still a feeling of guilt that I bought them on sale at a department store instead of a thrift store or FREE from the side of the road. 

And then, to add insult to my self image injury, I got a pedicure too. Oh, the indulgence of it all! 

It may strike you as funny but, somehow, at the age of 47 and with all of the resources I have, spending this way on myself is not without guilt. Why, you ask? 

I think I am altogether too pleased with how much I can suffer. Longsuffering and finding contentment is my sport of choice. So, I have to adopt self care as a habit. I have to make choices to take care of myself, adorn myself and carve out time for myself. What about you? What habits do you have that keep you on track?

(If you follow me on social media you’ll know, Saturdays are for self care and my weekly tips are actually just my own marching orders to practice self care while sharing my plans with the world to help hold myself accountable.)

Here's to another year and hopefully caring less,