This week, Canada marked the inaugural National Day for Truth and Reconciliation. September 30th will now stand as a national holiday day to reflect on our place as part of a shared and ongoing colonial Canadian history.

My childhood was devoid of Indigenous education. I attended both public and private schools and was afforded every opportunity to know the world around me and think critically about history but I never understood the negative effects of colonialism. I never knew about the 60’s sweep and I had no idea about the atrocities of the residential school system.

As an adult, I remember the first time I was exposed to the horrors of indigenous genocide in my country. I was 33, mother of two small children and I sat in a small auditorium of a local church, listening to a lecturer explain the residential school system and show slides of the buildings and faculty, sternly pictured with groups of oddly similar looking children. I remember being arrested at the sight of so many children, all wearing the same clothes, same haircuts and same expressions. To this day those children's faces haunt my thoughts and bring tears to my eyes. But when I first laid my eyes on them, I was 33.

Not long ago, 33 was middle aged and many did not live beyond 40. For all intents and purposes, I had lived my life assuming I had all the awareness I needed to work, raise a family and pay taxes. But on that day, my perspective shifted. 

So, on Thursday of this past week, I spent most of the day alone asking myself what I had done with the knowledge I gained when I was 33. Almost 15 years ago now. What did my raised awareness accomplish? How have I been reconciling that knowledge?

My truth is that I don’t know how. In fact, if I can be so bold, I don’t think any of us know how. Perhaps even our indigenous brothers and sisters don’t fully know what to ask for and how to move forward reconciling the past. But, I believe I still have the responsibility to make a difference in my own backyard.

A friend of mine recently encouraged me to check out : Reciprocity Trusts. I can tell you that I have signed up and am eager to begin decolonizing my backyard every month. Also, in my day job, I am working to build partnerships with the local Metis association to share our resources in benefit of their on-going work. 

Is it enough? No. But it’s a start. I cannot mark the next 15 years of my life with the same paralyzing guilt and inactivity. I can do better. How about you?

If you do nothing else, make sure you are informed. Take time to listen to indigenous stories; We Know the Truth. Do not get your information from colonial groups where voices are tainted by privileged perspective. Listen to people that have lived the genocide, lost loved ones and were tortured themselves. Let their stories inform your heart and your wallet. Only after you have taken time to do that can you engage in the true conversation. 

Let’s all do better,