Hey ,

This week, I’ve found myself sitting with a pattern I see often — in private sessions, in conversations, and sometimes in my own life too.

It’s the question of why certain people affect us so strongly.

Why one person can leave us feeling contracted, defensive, or strangely small… while someone else opens something in us that feels expansive, clarifying, even quietly hopeful.

The older I get, the less I think these reactions are random.

The people who trigger us most strongly are often touching identities within us that are ready to loosen or fall away.

And the people who inspire us deeply are often showing us something we are ready to embody.

Personally, I don’t think we meet people simply at the level of maturity we imagine ourselves to be at.

Read that again, and tell me if you agree.

More often, life brings us mirrors.

The overly self-focused person may show us where we have been leaving ourselves behind by minimising our own needs.

The chronic people pleaser may reveal where we have stopped giving freely, and become over-identified with what we are not receiving.

The hyper-independent person may highlight where we are still entangled in dependency.

And sometimes, someone who bends too easily shows us where we may need to mature our own capacity to give, rather than staying preoccupied with whether our needs are always being met.

Every person teaches us something, if we are willing to look beneath the surface of the dynamic.

And this is one of the reasons why regular sound work can be so supportive.

When the nervous system is unsettled, we don’t just feel differently — we perceive differently. We scan life through old fear, old scarcity, old emotional memory. We notice what confirms the familiar wound.

But as the body begins to regulate, things change.

The mind is less caught in defence.

The heart has more space.

And often, what becomes available is not a new answer, but a truer perception.

Sometimes clarity doesn’t come from thinking harder.

Sometimes it comes from becoming grounded enough, and safe enough, to see clearly.

If this week has stirred something in you, I’ll be in the scalar-sound lounge again this Saturday at 4:30pm.

You’re very welcome to join me.

SAVE YOUR SPOT HERE!

And if something more personal is moving for you, you’re always welcome to reply to this email and share where you’re at.

With love,

@akneskendra_phd x