Hey ,

The energy the last couple of weeks has been... intense, hasn't it?

So intense I had to check what transit was actually happening in the ethers.

Mars conjunct Mercury in Scorpio, with the Sun squaring Pluto - no wonder conversations have been cutting straight to the bone!

When Mars (action, desire) meets Mercury (communication) in Scorpio's depths, we're not having surface-level chats anymore. We're diving into the psychological undercurrents of how we actually connect.

And with the Sun squaring Pluto? It's asking us to transform the unconscious parts of ourselves almost entirely.

Which is probably why I found myself having such "interesting" conversations and noticing more eye-opening relationship patterns since last week.

This morning I read an article I'd like to share with you - about a therapist who recorded over 1,000+ conversations and discovered the one phrase that is most lethal to relationships.

"You Never Listen."

I know, right? Seems so innocent when you're feeling completely unheard.

In the article it mentions how at first this sounds harmless, even true.

But neuroscience is showing why it is one of the most damaging phrases we can say because our brains don't actually hear it as feedback about behaviour; we register it as an attack on who we are.

Not "You Missed What I Just Said Then" but "You're The Type of Person Who Doesn't Care About Me!"

When that happens, the listening part of the brain (prefrontal cortex) literally shuts down. The nervous system goes straight into protection mode (amygdala).

I experienced this firsthand recently - the moment someone I care about said those words, I felt my chest tighten and suddenly I was wanting to defend myself instead of actually hearing what was said.

And how many times have I said that myself to the people around me! 😇

So fact is the more we say "You Never Listen," the less they actually can.

I've been reflecting on how often we accidentally create the very disconnection we're trying to heal.

What if perhaps instead of blame, we offered invitation?

"Can I share something that's important to me?" or

"I know you care — can we slow down so we can really hear each other?"

If anything, I've realised how real communication is rarely about being right.

It's about keeping the other person's heart and nervous system open enough to actually receive what we're saying.

This Scorpio energy now is asking us to look at the deeper psychology of our own relationships - even with ourselves.

How often do we tell ourselves "You Never Get it Right" instead of offering gentleness?

I'm curious what shifts when we remember that everyone's nervous system is just trying to feel safe enough to stay open.

PS: Speaking of nervous systems coherence — if you're feeling called to drop into the collective field where listening happens naturally, there are still a few spots left this afternoon at 4:30pm.

PPS: But whether it's our sound session or a softer conversation with someone you love this weekend, remember to take a breath and remind yourself, that we're all just trying to feel safe enough to listen.

See you soon,

AK x